Friday, January 13, 2006

Happy Friday the 13th

You know those Friday the 13th movies where Jason hacks people to death? Those were horrible movies. You know that manager Ken Macha that hacks the A's seasons to death? He's a horrible manager.

Ken Macha is a black cat walking in your path. He is a broken mirror. He is the vampire standing there when you've just used the last of your garlic for your spaghetti sauce. He is the full moon. He is spilled salt. He is walking on sidewalk cracks. He is walking under a ladder. He is an open umbrella indoors.

Ken Macha is the worst thing in the history of the world. Today, on the first of what will be two friday the thirteenth's in 2006 (the next one is in October, when instead of playing in the ALDS, our season will be over because Macha is a fucking idiot), it is important to step back for a moment and realize just how cursed this franchise is with him as manager. I once showed a picture of Ken to Medusa, and she turned to stone. A werewolf once knocked on my door, but I didn't have any silver bullets, so I instead printed out a picture of Ken from the internet and threw it at it. The werewolf died instantly.

If you're superstitious, you need to get over it. Seriously, what's the worst thing that could happen? Could Macha's lineups gets any dumber? Could Macha have even less of a clue of when to make a pitching change, when to pinch hit for a batter, and who to put in during those situations? Could Macha possibly care less about this team? There is absolutely nothing that can happen to you today that could make your life worse, because there is absolutely nothing worse than Ken Macha.

There's bad luck......and there's Ken Macha. Give me bad luck any day of the week.

Happy Friday the 13th, A's fans.


Blogger Chuck Cheeze said...

Yo are your stats going up? Saw a link to your site on Deadspin today...congrats!

Friday, January 13, 2006 12:10:00 PM  
Blogger TJ said...

Hating Ken Macha is a cause worth rooting for...

Friday, January 13, 2006 1:04:00 PM  
Anonymous Zonis said...

is that a picture of Macha or Kendall?

Saturday, January 14, 2006 2:22:00 PM  

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